I’ve been feeling really low and finding parenting quite challenging. There are many obvious reasons that I won’t bore you with but the reality is that my children are growing and I am being challenged to grow along with them.
I realise now that I can’t parent the same way in perpetuity. I have got to evolve as a parent as my children grow. So I’ve been thinking about what this means for me and them. And if you’ve been following my blog you’ll know that involves a lot of talking it out with them as well.
I attended my son’s Easter Parade performance and as he’d done so well and since I didn’t have to return to work, I treated them to tea at Costa – on the proviso that they finished their homework there. So over hot chocolate, caffe latte for moi, sandwiches and marshmallow chocolate squares; we just sat there with no agenda. Eating, drinking and talking.
As we got up to leave, a gentleman seating a couple of tables away from us come up to me to say. “I just wanted to say I’ve been watching your children and they are so well behaved. Well done”. I tell you I could have cried. I almost did, I certainly did internally.
It didn’t fix any of the issues we are having but it felt good to hear that.
So my take home from this week is that life is full of twists and turns. So I will now take on the form of a chameleon. 😂😂😂😂😂
When it comes to parenting, rigidity doesn’t work; you only create more stress for yourself. After all there isn’t a one size fit all rule. The personalities and peculiarities of our children determine how we raise them not want someone else is doing with their children.
I recall a previous boss asking me how I was finding my new role as a manager. And my response was ‘it would be perfect if there were no people involved.’ Similarly, I would be a perfect parent if I had robots for children.
I would simply program them to do as I say; not talk back; pick up after themselves; definitely no tantrums and most definitely no mess.
My kids have challenged me this week and I’m grateful for a teachable spirit – at least for this week I do. They are actually helping me out with parenting. I’m doing a lot of listening. Sometimes it is unspoken, but it is there. Rigidity doesn’t help to uncover it. We really all should be more like the chameleon and adapt to change.
Nonetheless, I’m ever so grateful to that man who walked to me at Costa in Tesco on Newmarket Road. Thank you for doing what you didn’t have to. Thank you for being the hands and feet of God. Thank you for simply being kind.