The Limitations of Having a Vision

Last weekend I spent some time with a friend who talked about a dream of hers and how she was at the place where she was ready to go for it. It’s a very expensive dream to have so I can understand why it’s taken her a while to wrap her head around giving it a go. It’s also a dream that goes against the norm – not always easy to put your head above the parapet.

Having a vision means that you are boxed in. And as you get older, the more you junk stuff you are not interested in and so that vision continues to glare at you more and more.  And if like me you have a vision board on your wall, it stares at you before you go to bed and first thing when you wake up.

You can’t run away from who you are any more than you can can run away from the dreams gestating within you. You can put them on hold or dance around them, but they will always be alive within you waiting for an opportunity to flourish.

When we use the word dream, the tendency is for the mind to always go to some major adventure, project or accomplishment.  The tendency is to let other people’s accomplishments determine what we think a dream is.

A dream is whatsoever your heart desires. A better relationship with your spouse or a loved one, a peaceful home, a healthy diet, time for yourself in a busy world- a dream is whatever you imagine that is not yet a reality.

At some point you’ve got to admit to yourself that you are either not brave enough; hardworking enough; tough enough; committed enough; caring enough; whatever ……….. enough.  At some point you have to admit that just maybe, all along, you are the only one in the way of achieving your dream.

Mummy, Do You Know ………?

My son just walked up to me to ask where his swimming goggles are. I’m not quite sure if there is a job description for mummy about somewhere that states that she has super-natural powers.

I mean, how else would I know where he put the swimming goggles that HE took out of his bag himself last week and PLACED heaven-knows-where? I must have super-natural powers. No wait! In fact, I AM Wonder Woman, so I will use my x-ray vision to find them. Why didn’t I think of that?

Guilty Working Mum

My daughter is usually in a hurry to get to school and eager to be first in line before they go into their classroom. However, for the last couple of weeks she has insisted that instead of saying goodbye in the courtyards, I walk her to her class and give her a hug and kiss. And then she says that she’d like me to stay with her and that she’ll miss me. Very odd behaviour, particularly if you know my daughter.

I’m working on tenderness in my parenting (eye rolling but essential) so I sit with her; ask her why she wants me to stay and then tears ensue. So I have to stay a little longer and hug and kiss and wipe tears away whilst she sits on my lap. In the back of my mind, I’m thinking I need to get to work. I eventually calm her down and then tell her we’ll so something special when we get home.

The head teacher had observed it all and stops me to ask if everything was OK and promised to monitor her as she also found it to be odd behaviour for my daughter. That got me teary because I was grateful she was in a caring school and I can’t take that for granted. But I was also a mixed bag of emotions for a myriad of reasons.

I think every working mum feels guilty. I was wondering if I wasn’t spending enough time with her. Had I wrapped myself up so much in work that I was neglecting her? You know – those sort of fleeting thoughts.

Silly thoughts really because even if I wasn’t working, I wouldn’t be able to stay with her at school right? Go figure! Anyway, I made a decision to do something with her on her own this weekend. Just to bond.

As I drove to pick her up from school after work, I had visions of her running up to me and giving me one of her infamous bear hugs. I must admit that I was excited about receiving her hug especially after seeing her so distressed this morning. So imagine my surprise, no scratch that – horror,  as I walked towards the courtyard and she starts to back away – wailing that she didn’t want to go home, she wanted to stay at school.

Note to self- you are doing a BRILLIANT job as a mother and your children are fickle so don’t trust them! Simples!

Note To Self​: Don’t Try To Be Down With The Kids

On our way to school this morning, I told my son that his beloved Tottenham Hotspurs had been beaten by Manchester United. He asked what the score was, I told him 3-0. I was surprised, he was still smiling. It turns out that he had been joking with a teacher last week and boasting about how Tottenham always win and I guess he was imagining the taunting he was going to get from his teacher.

There was I, feeling cool that we were actually having a footie conversation until I uttered the immortal words, “now Tottenham are out of the League”. He looked at me like I was eating poo. And said, “of course they are NOT out of the League. How could they be out of the League?” What I of course meant to say was that the Champions League cup was out of their reach now. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to!

Note to self: you don’t understand football, you never will understand it. Just continue to nod and smile when son talks to you about it.